Should You Slow Down When Single?

If you’re single you’re supposed to “live it up” right?! But are we living it up too much? Do we need to clip our wings? I’m sharing all my thoughts today!

Red Gingham One-Shoulder Top || White Jeans || Gold Sandals || Lemon Clutch (similar) || White Earrings c/0 || Sunglasses c/o

I was reading one of my favorite blogs this week, The Stripe by Grace Atwood, and she touched on a subject that just got me FIRED UP y’all! (Not because of her feelings on it, lol, but because it’s happened to me SO many times!) I commented on her post and loved reading though everyone’s responses, but I also felt like I had so much more on my heart to share. So welcome to today’s “Heart to Heart Talk” post (a new idea I just made up while writing this!)

As most of y’all know (although I don’t talk about it often) I am S-I-N-G-L-E… and have been for a few years now. Although I’ve dated some (oh so many 1st dates) none have really stuck and alas I’m a single gal still! And you also know, I am one busy girl! I have a full time job, the blog, am a past-president of a large local non-profit, president-elect for another non-profit, auction co-chair for the Heart Gallery (a 3rd non-profit), a dog mom, a sister, a best friend… you get the idea! 🙂 Oh yeah, and I’m obsessed with traveling and have been on the go almost every other week!

And I love it! I love every busy, hectic, frantic, crazy, fulfilling minute of it.

But, a lot of people don’t understand it. If I had a dollar for every time that someone told me, “If you’d just slow down you’d meet someone…”  well friends I would have enough dollars to hire Patty Stanger to Millionaire Matchmaker me and I wouldn’t still be single! haha. But truly, on almost a weekly, sometimes daily basis I am told that I need to slow down & that I’m standing in my own way of meeting someone.

AND THAT GET’S ME ALL FIRED UP! (Sorry for the all caps but I’m so passionate about this!)

Because for a long time, I tried to “slow down” and stay home more often, and do the bar scene and the Sunday Funday scene, and you know what? It wasn’t what fulfilled me! I’m not a homebody by nature… I’m a busy bee! And I’ve got a case of wanderlust that can’t be contained. So awhile ago I decided to stop treating being single like a curse, and instead take it as a blessing and a time when I have virtually no-strings attached so I can purse the things that bring me joy. And so I volunteer, I write a blog, I’m involved in leadership, I travel, I attend every girl’s night out I can, I never turn down and invitation, and I’m living it up.

Red Gingham One-Shoulder Top || White Jeans || Gold Sandals || Lemon Clutch (similar) || White Earrings c/0 || Sunglasses c/o

And while being busy and on-the-go may not have brought me a man (I mean, is that really all it’s about?!) it has brought me fulfillment and happiness and joy. Everything I’m involved in challenges me in new and different ways. I’m constantly learning, meeting new people, discovering my strengths and weaknesses, finding my voice, and learning just who I am. If I just “slowed down” I never would have learned the many facets that make me, ME! And when the time comes that I (hopefully!) meet that special man, I’m going to be a better, stronger, happier version of myself than I ever would have been if I slowed down. I’m so glad that my future guy get to meet this version of me 🙂

So now I’m dying to hear from y’all!! What do you think about this idea that single girls should “slow down?” Do you have any experience with it? I want to hear ALL your thoughts on the subject!!

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20 Comments

  1. Chesson | Magnolia + Main
    August 24, 2018 / 6:41 am

    Slow down?? Nonsense! If going to all of the places and doing all of the things makes you happy, that’s exactly what you should do.

    • August 27, 2018 / 10:37 am

      I’m so glad you feel the same way! I always admired how much you and your hubby traveled and explored (whether near or far!)

  2. August 24, 2018 / 10:50 am

    Don’t slow down, men want someone who has a life and isn’t sitting around looking for a man. I met my husband when I was working full time, going to school part-time for my MBA, and volunteering like mad. You keep doing you and a man will eventually come!

    XOXO
    Cathy

  3. August 24, 2018 / 11:19 am

    You look super cute in this look … You do you … do what makes you happy … you don’t want to change your life (if you are already happy in it) in the hopes of finding someone. People meet people at all places, when the time is right.

    ❥ tanvii.com

  4. Stephanie
    August 24, 2018 / 11:45 am

    I can’t even express how much I love the way you think about the single life. I’m getting married in November – and I couldn’t be more excited – but sometimes I wish I had gotten the chance to truly enjoy single, adult life. I jumped into dating at 18 and never looked back. Now I’m settling down at 24 (again, crazy excited), but never got the chance to just … be single. And some might say “that’s a good thing!” I just know I would’ve had a life exactly like yours had I been single longer as an adult. It’s more fun to be busy anyways! I’m just happy now that I’ve found someone who lets me be a busy bee – and joins me sometimes 🙂

  5. August 24, 2018 / 4:34 pm

    I loved this post so much Gentry! My single years were some of my best! I learned so much about myself as a person figure out how to make myself happy and that I didn’t have to depend on a man. I say “You do you” and keep making yourself happy with the things you love to do! Maybe mister right will end up next to you on a plane! Haha 🙂

    xoxo,
    Kim

  6. Trish
    August 25, 2018 / 1:36 pm

    Never slow down!

  7. Mollie
    August 26, 2018 / 1:49 pm

    This is such a great approach to being single!!! LIVE IT UP GF!! Enjoy these moments you have all to yourself – travel, order whatever you want for dinner, go to the movies, treat yo self to something special. You have nothing holding you back from living the exact kind of life you want to live (not that a significant other should do that!! – but there is nothing quite like being totally on your own). You do you babe!

    xx Mollie

  8. Kelsey
    August 26, 2018 / 9:49 pm

    A man will come when you least expect it! 🙂 Also that is the cutest little clutch ever!

  9. August 27, 2018 / 12:26 am

    I think to each their own! One person might love to stay home and go out on a sunday to a bar for drinks and another might not come home until late every night because they are busy. I truly think that at some point in life you can meet someone. You don’t have to wait around for them because that is time you don’t get back. You do You!

    http://www.mylittlenest.org

  10. August 27, 2018 / 1:01 am

    Gingham never gets old. Love the combo with white denims dear. Really makes the color pop. Also, those gold sandals are really adorable!

    Jessica | notjessfashion.com

  11. Laura Leigh
    August 27, 2018 / 8:20 am

    Awesome post girl friend! I love your honestly and how open you are. The right person will truly come when you least expect it. Which is so annoying to hear but honestly so true. And like you said, that isn’t what life is all about either! Finding yourself and doing things for you are important too!

    xo Laura Leigh
    Louella Reese

  12. August 27, 2018 / 9:40 am

    I love that you’re staying true to yourself and staying busy in the things YOU love to do!! Not the stuff everyone tells you “should” do when single. I’m a firm believer that you will meet someone in His perfect timing ((and probably while doing the things you love!))

    -Morgan
    How 2 Wear It [] http://how2wearit.com

  13. August 27, 2018 / 10:34 am

    I must admit that I haven’t ever been single in my adult life. My husband and I met in high school and started dating in college but we’re both super independent and there were long periods of time when I was by myself while he was away so I got to in a sense live it up solo with friends doing all the things I wanted to do that I know weren’t so much his thing. I loved volunteering my time with the Junior League among many other things. Enjoy your life and at the right time, the right person will present themselves to you and will fit right in with your life!

    xo, Laura

    • girlmeetsbow
      Author
      September 5, 2018 / 6:52 am

      Thank you for your encouragement Laura! I have loved spending some of my free time volunteering with the Junior League too 🙂

  14. August 28, 2018 / 10:07 am

    Gentry, I think you are on the right track!! For one, you are most likely to meet someone if you are out and about rather than at home…but even if you don’t want to meet someone at Matthew 19:10-12 Jesus said that singleness is a gift! There are SO many opportunities out there that are harder to take when you are in a relationship or married. I think you are rocking it! You are wearing so many hats, and I think it’s amazing that you are using your singleness to do so many things!

  15. August 30, 2018 / 11:32 am

    That slow down to meet a man thing is completely ridiculous – if you did that you wouldn’t be being yourself. Plus, any guy you might meet will need to fall in love with the true you – and fit into that life with you, and possibly have a similar life outlook and passions. It all sounds too calculated and try hard for me. God has a plan for you and if a man is on the horizon, the right one will appear at the right time! I have tons of friends who only ‘settled’ and had family in their mid or even late 30s. Hey I have a friend who had a crazy career and life and only settled when she we in her late 30s and now at 41 has three kids under 3! She felt she had to leave the city to find the life she wanted, but we are all different! EMBRACE your wonderful life – that way in the future when you may have kids and a husband – you wont be living life with any regrets xx

  16. Lesley
    August 31, 2018 / 10:05 pm

    In my experience as a single girl, everyone has “advice”. I constantly hear that I shouldn’t live in my small town, hang out with my mostly married friends, go back to grad school, and the list goes on and on if I want to meet someone. But you know what? Those things are me! And while I would truly love to meet someone, I want them to meet me when I’m busy being myself. So, I fully support you…do you! 🙂

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